You Know You're Getting Old When...

...your idea of a good Saturday evening/night includes:

a.) Catching up on work E-mails
b.) Doing the dishes
c.) Cooking up a steak & drinking few beers
d.) Netflixing some Sherlock
e.) Maybe staying awake to watch SNL

Dude, WTF is happening to me? I feel like I should run out to the bar, load some AC/DC on the jukebox and immediately bang down half-dozen tequila shots in a vain attempt to turn back the clock on my youth, or at least stall Father Time for one more weekend. But, as we all know (those of us who are over 30, at least) that is fundamentally a losing battle and one that will actually, in the long run, set you back even further.

Let us consider, instead, the noble Grizzly Bear, who hibernates all winter. How exactly that applies here, I don't know. But I do know this: when you get older, you get smarter. When there's nothing specific to do, you don't feel the need to rush out and find something to do, or make something to do. Instead, you take the opportunity to chill the f--- out and save your hard-earned $$ and energy for when they are needed.

Also, more importantly, it's like 10 degrees outside, a fact which makes it reeeally un-enticing to go outside for any but the most necessary functions, like buying alcohol or taking out your stinking trash. A fact which (I desperately hope) has more to do with my wish to stay in the house on Saturday night than the fact that I'm getting "old." Cause f--- that. As Laurence Fishburne said in Boyz n the Hood "I'm not getting older, I'm getting better." I hope...