Skip to main content

Dryanuary: Days Three & Four

As a way to atone for my holiday sins and cleanse my poisoned body, I've determined to abstain from alcoholic beverages for the entire month of January. Apparently a lot of people do this and it's called "dryanuary." This is my story...

Day Three

Now we're getting into the real meat of this experiment. Days One and Two were a cake walk; it was more about preventing myself from just reaching for a beer or a glass of wine out of sheer habit than actually trying to stymie any desires. Day Three, Friday, was a little different.

Out at dinner the waitress rattled off the tap list, a nice line-up of microbrew taps for $4, and then hit me with the real left hook: Three Floyd's Zombie Dust on tap for $5. By the way my eyes lit up she almost immediately put me down for a pint.

"What, you're not getting one? But it's Zombie Dust. For $5 a glass..."

Some of you, like my esteemed "Everything Geek" Andrew Soliday might turn up your noses and say, "Meh...you can get Zombie Dust on tap for $4.75 at yada-yada-yada establishment" but I'm not a beer geek and I don't eat out that often. Therefore, the deal was hard to pass up. What's more, it was a Friday night and it was damn tempting to quaff a nice cold micro brew with dinner. But I resisted...and the story continues into....

Day Four

As I'm discovering, the real difficulty of this endeavor lies not necessarily in the abstinence from alcohol, per se, but in monitoring and changing my habits. I do not have some deep biological or mental need for booze; thank god I've been able to dance with spiritus frumenti for so long and come out relatively unscathed. However, as it is for most civilized gentlemen and women, alcohol is a big and enjoyable part of my life. Safe to say that in the normal course of events, few days go by when I don't indulge in at least a beer or a glass of wine with dinner. One of the enjoyable parts of becoming an adult is drinking for taste and appreciation rather than for effect; the goal is to compliment a meal or a gathering with friends, or just to unwind a bit, rather than to get hammered and loose control.

All which is to say: it's actually much harder now to go without drinking than it might have been when I was 24, because it's so much more a regular part of my life. When I was 24 if I wanted to avoid drinking, I would just avoid meeting eyes with the office Party Animal around Happy Hour on Friday. Now, it's a bit more tricky. All throughout my home lie exquisitely tempting beers, wines, and whiskeys. When you buy more than you drink, you build up quite a collection.

So again we ask: why give up something I enjoy? Even for a day, let alone a month? Well friends, I will meditate upon the answer to this question tomorrow.

Now, I shall repair to the living room (five feet away) and watch a movie, while I eat my pork chop and drink my WATER, and wait for the latest catastrophic winter blizzard to hit.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

New Yorker Fiction Review #151: "The Bog Girl" by Karen Russell

From the June 20 issue...

My loyal readers (if there are still any, which I doubt) will know I'm usually not a fan of Magical Realism, which, as you may also know, is Karen Russell's stock in trade. That said, there's nothing I love more than having my antipathy for magical realism shattered by an awesome story like "The Bog Girl."

Briefly, an Irish teenager discovers the body of a young woman who as been buried in a bog for over 2,000 years and begins to date her. What more do you need, right? If I'd read that one-line description somewhere else, and wasn't on a mission to review every New Yorker short story, I doubt I'd have read "The Bog Girl." But maybe I should start doing a George Costanza and do the opposite of everything I think I should do.

Where Russell succeeds here is in two main areas: 1.) Making us really love Cillian, the teenager who falls in love with the bog girl, and 2.) pulling the unbelievable trick making the characters…

Holiday Q&A, Volume 1

These questions come to us from Grace. Thanks for sending your questions!! Answers below:
What is the most thrilling mystery you have read and/or watched?
The Eiger Sanction (book and film) by Trevanian is what's coming to mind. International espionage. Mountain-climbing assassins. Evil albino masterminds. Sex. Not a bad combination. Warning, this is completely a "guy" movie, and the film (feat. Clint Eastwood) is priceless 70s action movie cheese. But in case that's your thing...
What's the deal with Narcos?
Narcos is a Netflix show about the rise and fall (but mostly the fall) of Columbian cocaine kingpin Pablo Escobar. Thus far there are two seasons of 10 episodes each. RIYL: The film Blow, starring Johnny Depp; the book Zombie City, by Thomas Katz; the movie Goodfellas; true crime; anything involving the drug trade. My brief review: Season 1 started out a bit slow and I know a bunch of people who never made it past the first few episodes. Some of the acting is a…

A Piece of Advice I Learned From My Grandfather

My grandfather was one of the most learned men I know. He read widely and voraciously, and not just in the sciences (he was a doctor); he loved politics, philosophy, and great literature as well. Whenever he finished a book he would write his thoughts about the book in the front cover and then sign and date it. To this day every once in a while I will open a book from my bookshelf or my mother's bookshelf, or at one of my family members' homes, and there will be my grandfather's handwriting. He was also a great giver of his books; if you remarked that you liked a particular one or wanted to read it, you were almost sure to take it home with you.

Reading is a very solitary pursuit but my grandfather was not a solitary person. He relished having family and friends around him which is convenient because he was blessed with a lot of both. And he carried out his intellectual life in a very "public" way as well. He was, in some ways, an intellectual evangelist. If he r…